On a positive note...

Sometimes it's hard to see the positive aspects of life, but I'm trying.

Saturday, July 01, 2006

Sometimes you have to make a choice.

We all know life is full of endless possibilities. With all the possibilities we have we sometimes have to make a choice. I'm not necessarily a person who likes to chose sides when two friends are having a fight. Most times I'll even risk the wrath of one or the other or even both to try and get them to understand the others POV and patch the friendship back together. Unfortunately that's not always possible. Especially when one of the friends feels she has the right to air what, for all intents and purposes, is dirty laundry on a public forum that mutual friends, as well as others, read.

The public just doesn't have the right to know every little, dirty detail of our lives no matter how much they encourage us. One of the things I expect of a true friend is that my personal life will be kept off of a PUBLIC forum. I've just learned that one of my friends isn't capable of doing that if she gets mad at you. She has proven to me, by her attack of another friend, that she can't be trusted should the friendship run into trouble. She has chosen to take the low road and lash out publically at the other friend in a vicious and callous manner that I find completely reprehensible. Even IF the entire story were true in ALL aspects, which it's not, the fact that she made it PUBLIC crossed the line of friendship.

Friendship is based, in part, upon trust. If I chose to have you be a part of my life as a friend I expect you to maintain my confidence even if we should part company as friends someday. I would never post every detail of our friendship, good or bad, on a PUBLIC forum. The fact that this person has done so tells me she isn't to be trusted...ever...and was never a true friend to anyone but only a friend as long as it served her purposes. For me, that's a very hurtful thing to realize.

As for me, I've made my choice and it's to remove myself from this very toxic persons life. I don't expect her to care as it's obvious to me she cares little for others and only for herself, but I hope she begins to understand someday, soon, that she will be very alone in this world should she continue down the path she has taken here. The only people she will have left in her life are the voyuers who read her blog daily, cheering her on, watching for the next train wreck to happen. It's very sad, but she is her own worst enemy. I sincerely hope this person grows up oneday.


  • At 11:17 AM, Blogger Debra McCarthy said…

    Aleta, You know how much I love you, right? Good. Jus' checkin'! ;)

    Thank you for that. I know that had to be hard for you.

    You are so good to me. And, like I have said before, a true friend to so many. With friends like you I can face anything.

    See you tomorrow.

  • At 5:38 PM, Blogger Susan Jones said…

    You rock girl!
    Yup, and yup on your post.
    Been there in the past few months, only it wasn't ONE, it was A FEW!
    Its really really hard to accept, but, one must and move on..you have! yah!
    I'm getting there.

  • At 11:24 AM, Blogger C. said…

    I dealt with someone who was like this for a long time. The guy did everything he could to bash me both as a person and in a professional manner.

    Fortunately, karma is indeed a bitch. The time eventually came around when I got to tell MY SIDE of the story which, by the way, was significantly less "him friendly" than the one he'd been feeding his buddies for years.

    You reap what you sow.

    Thank God.


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